Mel Mariposa logo in script

Decorum

Like the Terms and Conditions page...except I actually expect you to read these.

My Expectations

I expect you to be polite in all correspondence, clean (please wash your ass) and well groomed, arrive on time or inform me promptly of any lateness. It is my expectation that you’ve read this website and will not bring your altruistic contribution in a plain white envelope.  A card, book, tin, or a leather envelope are a few suggestions but feel free to get creative and show your personality or just use an ATM envelope in a pinch.

I believe in treating others the way I wish to be treated and I respect that both your time and money are valuable. I expect reciprocity in that. As such, please confirm all visits no less than 24 hours in advance so I can confirm my pet sitting and/or travel arrangements. A lot of these things are non-refundable after that window, and I only handle them upon your confirmation.

Your Expectations

What you see is what you get!  Freshly showered and softly scented, wearing light makeup and natural or French tipped nails.  Bright eyes, a secret smile, and a warm heart ready to melt the troubles of the day away.  Someone who can both listen and talk.  Lead and follow.

I am infinitely adaptable.

Deposits (Don't Panic)

A small good faith deposit is requested of new patrons.  I have a multitude of ways (including anonymous) to make your deposit, and I give you a % range so you can send select an amount that makes you comfortable. I want both of us to go into our meeting feeling safe and secure.

If you are worried I will steal your deposit, I don't want to spend time with you.  Why would I want to share my space and self with someone who thinks so little of me?

Cancellation

Life happens and I appreciate that you respect my time enough to ensure I am not out of pocket if you should need to cancel.

Within 3 days of the visit: 50% of the scheduled time.
2 days or less: 100% of the scheduled time.

Exceptions to this policy can be made for legitimate emergencies and illness with proof of the event in question. I am not a monster.

All visits may be rescheduled instead of cancelled for NO FEE. If you reschedule less than 72 hours before the visit I appreciate that as a gentleman you pay costs I incur as a result of hotel/flight cancellations so I am not out of pocket.

YOU MUST CONFIRM OUR VISIT NO LESS THAN 24 HOURS IN ADVANCE OR IT WILL BE CONSIDERED A CANCELLATION.


Treat Me

Gifts and Tips

Gifts and tips are completely optional, and the best treasure is the pleasure of your company on repeat visits as we become regular friends. That said, I do offer options for gift giving for those who wish to do so. Please know I am eternally grateful and it is never expected.

If you wish to bring a gift, I have a wishlist for your pleasure.  I love all things handmade (doesn’t have to be by you).  I also appreciate leather envelopes to add to my collection, hollow books, non-hollow books (memoirs and poetry are my favourite).If you wish to bring libations know that I am a light drinker, at best (unless it is a *very* special occasion).  I would suggest bottle of Armand de Brignac (your pick) for us to share.  If you’re looking to bring something more red, please bring a Cabernet Franc (Inkblot preferred) or plan to be drinking it alone (which I do not mind).

I do also enjoy Inniskillin Ice Wines with my favourite also being Cabernet Franc or any of their sparkling ice wines.  I am also fond of good gin. Please feel free to introduce me to your favourites, as they may become my new favourite.  I am very open minded and love trying new things, especially when celebrating with you.

Philanthropy
I prefer doing hands on community based outreach work whenever possible.  If interested, ask me more in person. For the things I can't help directly, the following are charities I support:
I can't give you a tax deduction, but I will take a donation up to $100 off your visit for donating to one of the charities on this list in my name (with proof).

OAQ

What's your schedule?
I don't publish one. I know that sounds a bit odd right? But I've been thinking: This is a discretion industry. You know what doesn't feel discreet? A detailed schedule on the open internet for everyone to see. So here's the gist off it: I have a residence in NC, and one in CO. I drive between them several times a year. I drive to visit family up and down the entire eastern seaboard every month. I spend *a lot* of time in Vegas, and some in Seattle. If you want to see me, and you're anywhere near any of those locations we can make it work. Email me (as indicated on my reservation page) and we'll talk.
How do I find you?
If you've made it this far, it's evident that my life is an extraordinary tapestry of travel. I average 7-9k miles a month in the summer, and 4-6k in the winter. Between livestreaming, outdoor adventuring, and travelling between my two residences (that are 1700 miles apart) + visiting family in the northeast I hit *a lot* of places, and can always route you in. If the thought of meeting me has sparked your curiosity, I invite you to take the next step. Send me an introduction, as outlined on my reservation page. Allow the connection to unfold as the spark of excitement ignites. With anticipation in the air, I invite you to embrace the wildfire of desire.
Health Mitigation
I don't care if you have shots or anything of the sort. That's not what this is about. I know that's the illness du jour, but I don't want RSV, either flu strain, or a cold either. So if you feel even the slightest bit off, please reschedule. Don't try to tell me it's "just allergies" or your throat is just scratchy/raw. I will put you out and keep the money. I am asthmatic and my dad has cancer with the immune system of a late stage AIDS patient. Let's work together to not be the thing that kills him. I would very much appreciate (but do not require) you take a C19 rapid test just before coming to see me. If it's positive, we can reschedule. The only thing I want either of us to spread is joy. If you have health coverage, you can potentially get several for free. On a completely unrelated aside, C19 rapid tests make fantastic gifts for your favourite provider.

IF YOU TEST POSITIVE FOR ANYTHING CONTAGIOUS WITHIN A WEEK OF SEEING ME, PLEASE LET ME KNOW! There is no stigma, no judgement, and I expect nothing else from you. But I need to know so that I can test&treat + so I do not spread it to anyone else.
Can we text?
I do not use a smartphone.  I have a 2022 Nokia for emergencies like my car breaking down, but I do not use a phone in my every day life. I do offer texting as part of my vGFE packages but I admittedly do it from my desktop or laptop.
Do you see men of colour?
Absolutely.  I love men of all colours, shapes, and sizes.  Variety truly is the spice of life!
Do you see larger men?
Absolutely.  Please be up front if your size requires any special accommodation, and know there is no need to be embarrassed if it does.  I'm asking because I want to accommodate so you can have the best experience possible.
Do you see couples?
Being your unicorn is one of my favourite roles to play.  I am there to enhance your evening and be whatever you need me to be.  I do not charge an extra fee for couples, but do request a 3 hour booking for our first encounter.
FMTY?
Yes, though I typically drive.  If I'm flying, I prefer you Fly Us To Paradise and we indulge in a weekend together.  4+ hours is usually the minimum based on where you are in the country but can be less if you're closer. Travel cost based on actual cost of travel and paid up front.
Can I review you?
I don't care.  Worth noting, none of the sites besides ECCIE publishes them even if you do submit one.  This is because I've given interviews on what I think of the review industry (including review sales) and they don't like that.

If they’re an important thing to you before you see me, I totally understand. We live in a review driven society and you want to make sure you’re getting a quality experience. Google my name and reviews in quotes.  You should find what you’re looking for.

If not:
  • My profile on ECCIE is still active. After a dry spell of 7 years, someone reviewed me! If that's important to you, please enjoy.
  • You can see the list of reviews I had on the other site here.  You can’t read them, but you can see they existed.  I de-listed when they said you couldn’t give a 10 to someone without specific activities.
  •  Here are some kind words from patrons in Vancouver wishing I was back.
  • This enthusiastic gentleman once started an effort to get me to Winnipeg.
  • I did an AMA on reddit once.  I can’t do all the work for you though so if you want that one, you’ll have to dig a little.  It’ll be fun.
I hope this is enough to assure you that I am genuine and enthusiastic about what I do!
You game right?
Primarily Switch these days.  PC and Retro consoles when I have time. I have a collection of CRTs. Splatoon 3, Diablo 3, MH: Rise are my bread and butter but I'm into a lot more we can talk about in person.
Did you build this website?
I did! In 2018 I opened Red Umbrella Hosting which I later added “and Design” to.  My goal is to bring simple, attractive, affordable websites to providers. If you wish to gift your favourite provider a new website or links page, contact me! I offer both WordPress and static HTML websites (like this one!)
What are your PC Specs?
You can see the specs of my desktop on Twitch.
I got a bunch of other little toys like mini PCs I use for fun projects.  Ask in person!

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